


A Conversation

by decepticute



Category: The Transformers (IDW Generation One)
Genre: Canon Character Injury, Canonical Character Death, Light Angst, M/M, idk just a lot of The Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-20
Updated: 2016-09-20
Packaged: 2018-08-16 10:19:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8098339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/decepticute/pseuds/decepticute
Summary: Chromedome and Rewind talk about what happened with Dominus Ambus. Takes place somewhere during #53, after the Big Reveal and the arm thing.





	

**Author's Note:**

> my ass hasnt written fanfic in 3 years and this is literally just a warmup to start usin the new account again, feat The OTP

It was a long time before either of them said anything.

Before anything else, the fact that Chromedome was down one arm had to be dealt with. He was leaking all over the place, which would qualify as an emergency even if recent events hadn’t weakened him. Besides that, in their current situation, most were already at a disadvantage with all limbs in working order, so it was really in everyone’s best interest if they let someone reattach the arm as quickly as possible. The two of them sat in relative silence as Ratchet both fixed him up and ran a myriad of tests to ensure that the (hopefully former) mnemosurgeon’s spark wasn’t still on the verge of fizzling out. 

It wasn’t, thankfully. But Rewind still wouldn’t let go of the hand that was still fully attached to his conjunx, as if the occasional gentle squeezes he got in return were the only assurance he had that Chromedome was still among the living. There were too many words the two of them had yet to exchange, and they hung in the air like a thick fog, the uncomfortable tension of the room caused by their mingling EM fields enough to make even those unaware of what had transpired between them shift uncomfortably upon entrance. They were going to have to talk about this, and soon, but they weren’t quite up to the task yet. Not when everything was so fresh. And definitely not with such a close audience.

It was one thing to have a millennia-long search ended in a single, tragic moment, and a completely other one to find that someone you loved deeply was kept in such a state for an indeterminable but almost definitely excessive amount of time. Rewind might be inclined to disbelieve the level of cruelty to which his former conjunx had been subjected, had he not both closely documented the darkest spots of Cybertronian history and become intimately familiar with the DJD. The two were, in a way, related. The DJD represented the evil their race was capable of, though its existence was but a few steps up from the unspeakable acts that Rewind had seen before, either through firsthand account or on film acquired from outside sources. Still, accepting that Dominus had been a target of this evil… was difficult, to say the least.

_At least I finally know_ , Rewind thought darkly, and then thought about it no more.

Because, really, how could he afford to, now, with the DJD practically at their doorstep, and with Chromedome still injured? An injury that Rewind caused to prevent him from sacrificing himself for what he truly thought was Rewind’s best interest. He really believed that his life mattered less than Rewind’s happiness, didn’t he? Additionally, he believed that said happiness would only be achieved if Rewind were with Dominus instead, and he was willing to make that a reality at any cost. Even if it killed him.

The knowledge that Chromedome not only wholeheartedly believed that Rewind would choose Dominus over him, but also loved him enough to die so that they could have a life together, put Rewind beyond words. He didn’t know exactly what to say, or where to even begin, but he knew that something would have to be said eventually. So, in the meantime, he said nothing.

When Rewind finally did speak, he addressed Drift. “Sorry,” he said quietly, looking up at the white mech briefly before letting his gaze fall to his own lap.

“Don’t worry about it,” said Drift, and meant it. There were far too many things to worry about at the moment as things were, so Rewind was inclined to do as he was told.

“Thanks for comm-ing me,” Rewind told him, then fell silent again. He stole a glance at Chromedome’s face, quickly looking away before he had a chance to look over and meet his gaze. 

Chromedome hadn’t brought himself to look at him even once since the arm came off.

Once the arm had been dealt with, Ratchet looked awkwardly between the pair and gruffly announced, “I’ll… give the two of you some space.” With that, he ushered Drift into the hallway and moved to the far side of the room, suddenly paying a lot of attention to Velocity’s reports. Whether or not he was actually reading them was up for debate.

They were quiet for a long time still. Eventually, Rewind was the one to break the silence, having had enough of sitting around and avoiding conversation. “Are you feeling okay?” he asked, lightly running a hand over one of the fins on the side of his conjunx’s face. 

“I’m fine,” Chromedome replied flatly. He still refused to look at the other.

“The thing is, you’re really not, though, are you?” It wasn’t actually a question. 

So Chromedome didn’t answer. There was another pause.

The words didn’t come easily, but Rewind forced them out anyway, in a quiet, disbelieving tone. “You were really gonna do it.”

Chromedome’s visor softened, his gaze still fixed on the ceiling. “Yeah…” he admitted. “I really was.”

“Why did you think I would choose his life over yours?”

No response.

“Why did you think I would choose that, Domey?” Rewind repeated, demanding an answer.

Still no response.

“ _Chromedome_. Answer me.” He gently tugged on Chromedome’s finial. “Look at me… Did you really think I’d want that? For you to… to die like that? Why would you think—”

“You’ve been looking for him for _millions of years_ ,” Chromedome interjected, sitting up suddenly and whipping around to face him. “What was I supposed to think? What was I _ever_ supposed to think when he was all you could talk about?”

“Domey…”

“I could’ve fixed him! You could’ve had him back, after all this time! I was _so close_ —” And then he was trembling, threatening to fall back against the makeshift mediberth, at once realizing that maybe forcing himself upright so quickly after losing so much energon and quite nearly his life wasn’t the best idea.

“Domey, careful,” Rewind warned, helping him lie back against the surface once more. 

Once Chromedome’s head had cleared, once he was over the initial waves of dizziness and could locate his train of thought once more, he let out a soft ex-vent. “I was always fine with being his replacement,” he confessed quietly, “just as long as that meant that I got to be with you. At least for a while, anyway.”

“Domey…” Rewind thought that his spark might melt through its casing from that. Had Chromedome really always felt that way? And had he really not noticed, or even considered the possibility, that his conjunx might have really believed that Rewind would leave him for Dominus once the search was over? “You weren’t a replacement. I love you, not just when someone else isn’t available.” With that, he climbed onto the berth and made his way to rest at Chromedome’s side, a hand over the golden mech’s chestplate.

Chromedome said nothing, just nodded slightly and gently pulled Rewind closer with one arm. He reached over and placed his hand over Rewind’s much smaller one, noticing not for the first time the way that it was nearly covered just by his palm.

“For future reference,” said Rewind after a pause, “if it ever comes down to it again, you or anyone else… You’ll always come first. No matter what. I promise.”

“I’m glad that’s settled, then,” said Chromedome, letting his hand fall a bit so that he could stroke the back of Rewind’s with a thumb.

Rewind leaned against him, feeling the gentle hum of his motor and the light buzzing of his spark, and allowed himself to do only that for a few moments. Just feeling. Just existing, with the one that he loved, letting it fully sink in that he was still alive. Still there. They were both still there, together. When he spoke again, his voice was low and full of hesitation. “I don’t think…”

“That’s quite the admission,” teased Chromedome.

Rewind pushed him gently, good-naturedly. “Shut up.” Then he was serious again. “…I don’t think I can lose you again, Domey. I really, really don’t think I could take that a second time. So… Can you just… stop dying without me? Just avoid that from now on?”

“I could say the same thing to you,” Chromedome remarked, pulling him more tightly still to his chest. “No more dying without each other, then. I think we’ve done enough of that. And I think that we are, probably, right? We’re probably going to die.”

Rewind shivered despite himself as detailed memories of exactly what the DJD was capable of flooded his processor. The answer was a resounding, emphatic yes. They were almost definitely going to die. “But at least we’ll be doing it together,” he said softly, repeating something that Chromedome once said to him.

“At least we’ll be doing it together.”


End file.
